Dear Das

Thank you for your continued support. I have some ideas on my lack of input of late. I always wanted to have a ‘usual’ drink, gin and tonic, vodka and lime, vodka and orange, Jack D and ice, but instead I flitted about between all of these and more, never able to stick with one. I always wanted a steady brand of fags, 20 Malboro Red, Gold, JPS, Rothmans, B&H but instead I’d smoke any of the aforementioned for months or years then swap. Same with hairstyles, hair colour, music, clothes and men. And so too with writing, art and craft. I pick something up, love it loads, then drop it and can’t seem to get back into the swing. Last year it was painting, then sewing now embroidery. No staying power.

Alternatively, perhaps like Pat Butcher and Emily Bishop my storylines have dried up and I’m fading away. In the beginning I could cram a fatal car crash, prison stretch, secret love affair, meet and greet with long lost child and revelations about my days prostituting into just half an hour and now it’s as much as I can do to pop in for a sweet sherry and wring my hands over someone else’s trauma.

And now the baby’s crying.

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